Sometimes a train of thought will remain with me, even after I've supposedly "scratched that itch."

I somehow got the idea that perhaps I was being unfair to people who didn't understand the opportunity that service represents. I think Aaron Zahn wasn't yet 40 when he became CEO of JEA.

I was around 35 when I was XO of JOHN HANCOCK and did all those burials at sea. I was around 40 when I spoke for the HMC's (corpsman, chief petty officer) retirement.

Those were each "little epiphanies." It wasn't until much later, well into my 60s, when I began to understand and appreciate what those little epiphanies meant. What the value of meaning is.

The "meaning" of meaning was another little epiphany that occurred during my personal crisis, the end of my marriage and the end of my navy career. Trying to discern what that all "meant," standing amidst the wreckage, with the help of a therapist and a lot of reading made me understand that "meaning" is contingent. It doesn't exist as something apart from us. "Life" is meaningless. We must make meaning. Failure is the universe's way of trying to get your attention.

Nobody teaches you this as an adolescent or a young adult. I'm not sure a child could understand it. Maybe I'm wrong.

I had a correspondent this morning talk about their experience, in military service and in academic life.

There was little expression of appreciation for his military service, public or professional; and academic life exposes the contradiction between what we say we believe, and how we actually behave.

Of course, hypocrisy is nothing new and it's become seemingly endemic in public life. Everything is a facade. I think social media is another corrosive factor in that. (Please know that I understand there are exceptions. And while they may be many, or of wonderful merit or worth, they remain, in the main, exceptional. The overall effect is a net negative.)

And there is plenty of hypocrisy to go around, spanning the entire political or ideological spectrum.

It goes back to the "do the work" post. Posing is not working. But we want to appear attractive, to whatever tribe we wish to appeal to, so we signal and pose and manage to completely avoid "doing the work." (Who would have time?) We live in a media saturated culture, and that means appearance is reality. We are all the stars of our own little reality programs. Working on our "personal brand." Marketing ourselves to "viewers" or "only fans."

Meaning is conveyed in narrative, but meaning is forged in action in the field of value. What "matters" to us? Those are, or were, our "values." I feel like I should read Zen and The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance Again. Get reacquainted with Phaedrus. Lord knows the writing around this joint could use the help.

We have no institutions today whose role is convey those values. Ideally, I suppose it might be a "culture," but our culture is rotted through and through with the values of capitalism, consumerism and competition.

We have no institution to teach the meaning of "meaning," let alone the value of "values." I suppose it once was the church, but even they seem to have some difficulty keeping the thread. In this country, the "separation of church and state" has never been thinner. Even "church" leaders desire secular power; and let's not discuss "televangelists" who have the same emptiness that compels CEOs and politicians to seek ever more power and wealth and the people attracted to those who have it.

And all of this has to be considered against the backdrop of a large proportion of this society that has to spend most of its time just trying to meet the demands of day to day existence in a culture that seems to want to value compassion but can't find the wherewithal to exhibit it.

Politicians and corporate executives come from, mostly, privileged backgrounds. They have at least had the opportunity to reflect, to practice some introspection. But since competition seems to be one of our premiere "values," well, who has the time?

Anyway, I get it. But it's a pity.

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Originally posted at Nice Marmot 06:38 Monday, 18 March 2024